Took down chapter 22 for some necessary maintenance. I will try to repost it tomorrow once i've finished the editing I want to do.

And... while I'm posting this mini-blog, I also need to make a public service announcement that I will be taking down the majority of That Hideous Slumber in the near future, as I prepare the final eight chapters, and begin the big push to get the story edited and up to code for potential publishing. I intend to leave up chapter one, and whatever the most recent chapter is, until I reach 29. However, all chapters will be available upon request via email.

That is all, thanksmuchbaiseeya llamas.

If You Trust

New poem. Let me know what you think.

"If You Trust"

If you trust in your lungs,
take a deep breathe and dive on in
but the ocean goes on for miles,
and the surface may not be waiting
on the other side,

If you trust in your heart,
follow this winding path
you've set yourself on,
but I don't think it ever ends,
it just meanders in circles into eternity

I trusted my hand,
would be filled with the hand of another,
but my hands are empty now,
and I can't trust them to guide me,
down these dark hallways

I don't trust my eyes,
because I can't see the way,
quite so clearly,
I don't trust in my feet,
because they stumble
ever so easily

I trusted my hand,
would be filled with the hand of another,
but my hands are empty now,
and I can't trust them to guide me

I trust in the one who's holding my heart,
I trust in the one who's got me
in the palm of their infinite hand,
a hand that will never lose its way,
a heart that can't be led astray,
an eye that never wavers.

If you trust in yourself,
let go of everything you know,
and trust in this one thing
we can all be sure of.

Jesus.

Discard Time

"Discard Time"

Every morning I hear a noise,
the clock calls me from slumber,
breaks apart every dream,
like sunlight burning away fog,
and scattered clouds.

All I ever hear about is time,
lives ruled by the ticking,
by the resounding alarms,
12 numbers that tell us when to
do what we do,
go where we go,
sleep when we sleep

But I've been thinking,
what if we could discard time?
What if we let go of all the years,
the seconds,
the minutes,
the hours
Would we miss anything?

If we've really got forever,
does it matter what time it starts?
If we've really got forever,
why does it matter when we stop?

I would never burn one precious word,
nor a page, or a beautiful book,
but I wonder what would be borne from the chaos
if we burned all our wristwatches,
and unplugged every alarm clock.

I want to discard time.

That Hideous Slumber (Poem Version)

I enjoyed writing a poem about The Red Elevators, so I wrote one based on my current story.

"That Hideous Slumber"

With effortless motions,
you put a poem in my heart,
you know I'd do anything for you,
and when they twist your shape,
all out of recognition,
my love never changes faces,
I'd do anything for you.

Whether a bluebird,
so tiny and vulnerable
or a great tree with summer leaves,
in the midst of Autumn's grasp
I know it's you when it's you,
I'd journey around the world,
beggar in the courts of queens,
stare down wolves the size of oxen,
dive into the furthest depths of the sea,
I'd do anything for you.

There's a whole wide world waiting for us,
Silver cities that shimmer in the sun,
golden armies and rabbit kings,
Emperors and thieves,
vagabonds and princes,
all will quail before us one day,
when they understand they face something
beyond flesh and blood,
I'd do anything for you.

That hideous slumber can claim me,
the world can rip us apart,
with all their myriad trappings and curses,
but I'm not afraid to dream,
nor will I shrink from the nightmarish,
this descent into darkest sleep
I'd do anything for you.

Goals!

My friend and I made a list of goals we want to accomplish by this time next year. Here's mine in (slightly) edited form... Some of them are kind of joking but most are pretty serious.

-Living on my own
-Pay off student loan
-Get a better job
-Grow a beard
-Save up $3000 (or more!)
-tithe off every paycheck
-Practice music
-Quiet time (or devotions if you prefer...) every day
-Work out more (and take protein)
-Eat healthier (and learn how to cook)
-Finish my book (and then write another!)
-Take vitamins
-Find a wife (Ok honestly I have a strict it'll happen when it happens policy.)
-Surfing trip to ocean with Derrick
-Get rid of junk I don't need
-No shave november (still on the fence about this...)
-Spend less/save more
-Be more positive
-Be more generous with my time and money
-keep my room cleaner
-keep my car cleaner
-Save up for a new car
-Drink more water
-Sleep more during the work week
-Speak with more conviction, mumble less
-Learn to to hold a conversation better, maintaining eye contact

I took off getting a pet turtle, finding new insurance, keeping up with laundry better, and learning a new language, because i only added them to make my list as long as Derrick's.

Untitled Poem

Here's a new poem and another oddity. Let me know what you think. I guess this one is sort of like a story. Enjoy... hopefully!!

"Untitled #6"

Somebody told me there's a secret,
to weaving straw and turning it precious,
but I haven't the skill in my fingers,
nor the drive.
Such material trappings,
have never motivated me.

Somebody told me to spin them a coat,
born of the finest gold,
but I'd rather spin you a dress,
to match your beautiful voice,
the songs of a wayward angel,
that hover around your head,
the words that are finer than precious stones.

Sing to me a melody that never falters,
while the silver flutes play a tune
that will make all these colored yarns,
dance through the air,
in thoughtlessly beautifully entangling patterns,
endlessly intricate tapestries,
weaved in every one of a million colors

Sing to me a song of golden thread,
a cord that cannot be cut,
a bond that could never be broken,
the love between you and me,
that no man can sever.

The Red Elevators (Poem Version)

While I'm still deeply wrapped up in That Hideous Slumber, I've been getting ideas for what might be my next story, called the Red Elevators. I wrote this poem as a teaser of sorts.

"The Red Elevators"

The streets are heavy with snow,
I walk with shoulders hunched,
This ragged sweater,
unraveling at the hems,
is my only protection.

I have been summoned,
to the place no one comes back from,
to the place everyone fears.

There's a building waiting for me,
with red elevators that climb into the sky,
red elevators will carry me away,
and I'll never be seen again.

Walk inside an empty atrium,
footsteps echoing all the way,
I push the button and wait,
enter on the ding,
and then I step inside.

I grip the railing with white knuckles,
push another button and then,
we're off, we're away.
but I swear I'm not afraid.
I just don't know how to make my hands stop shaking.
This red elevator is carrying me away,
but I swear I'm not afraid.